It’s basically District 9 fanfic. 👽💘👱 Wonderful romance between a human social worker and her alien “case”. And don’t worry about the sex! It’s hot, alien and detailed, no “fade to black”. 😘
heyyy so. i went into this movie expecting a really cute fishy romance, which it. almost was. but i had no idea there was gonna be extremely graphic, gratuitous violence, a hell of a lot of nudity and sex scenes (one dude literally fucks his wife on screen which was a lot), and a cat gets eaten on screen.
the cat thing was the most upsetting, the rest was just either really awkward or unsettling. but, yeah. i had no idea about any of that, and was kind of unnerved coming out of the film.
please be careful if you plan on seeing this movie. it’s not a bad movie, but i’ll admit i was really put off.
Yeah seriously! It was really really good, but I had a panic attack after the film because it was so stressful, and an employee had to literally hold my hand and lead me out of the theatre step by step, because I had such a bad shutdown …
Movie, here I come!!! Can’t wait to see it…which will be in February in my part of the world :(((
By the time I get to see it in cinemas I’ll probably have pieced the whole movie together via tumblr gif sets.
JIM HENSON’S THE STORYTELLER: HANS, MY HEDGEHOG
Reylo vibe recommendation by @shutup-fuzzball who describes it like this: “…its obviously a Beauty and the Beast story but The princess doesn’t just sit and look pretty, she’s an active character like Rey and goes out to find Hans and make things right again between them. I love how Hans is the gentle beast; the scars from his youth much like Kylo/Bens experiences have made him who he is later, into an imposing and even frightening figure until the princess opens up to him and they connect.”
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I highly recommend this surprisingly sexy puppet enhanced story. To me there are also Prince Lindworm and East of the Sun, West of the Moon vibes.
It also reminded me of an interesting BatB version from a french fairy tale collection I read very long ago but still can remember. In this version the Beauty marries the literal devil. In their wedding night the devil asks Beauty if he should turn into an animal. Among two or three other suggestions he also proposes to turn into a hedgehog (!). Beauty declines all his offers and rather has him as a his devilish self. 🙄 The devil turns out to be a totally fine and considerate husband btw which is the reason Beauty’s sisters become jealous and start plotting against her. To my never-ending teenage frustration the sisters succeed and Beauty loses her devil husband.
ANYWAY, is there an ancient hedgehog symbolism I don’t know about?
Or does somebody by any chance know this version of the fairy tale? I’d absolutely love to read it again.
Do you have a REYLO VIBE recommendation? Submit or contact me! 💙💙💙
Bryony and her sisters have come down in the world. Their merchant father died trying to reclaim his fortune and left them to eke out a living in a village far from their home in the city.
But when Bryony is caught in a snowstorm and takes refuge in an abandoned manor, she stumbles into a house full of dark enchantments. Is the Beast that lives there her captor, or a fellow prisoner? Is the house her enemy or her ally? And why are roses blooming out of season in the courtyard?
Armed only with gardening shears and her wits, Bryony must untangle the secrets of the house before she—or the Beast—are swallowed by them.
no. they are dead and scary not in a hot way. yes even the two at the end. 0/10
any of the kaiju from pacific rim
they are big rowdy boys so banging them is inadvisable, but, really, how much do we actually know about them? they could learn to love. 1/10
The Pale Man
absolutely not. eats kids and represents the selfish greed of those in power. -1000000000000/10
The Faun
shifty as heck, always speaking in riddles and half truths. i don’t trust him but i’d bang him. 4/10
(this is where we start getting into creatures that we know are equipped to have sex)
Hellboy
he’s immature, for sure, but he has a good heart and loves kittens. Plus he’s got a rockin bod and a tail, so i’m not sure what else you could want in a bf. 8/10
Abe Sapien
i love this sweet sweet nerdy fish boy. he’s a bit shy and maybe has some boundary issues but all in all he’s a good boy. 9/10
The Gillman (AKA The Asset)
what is there to say about this beautiful boy that hasn’t already been said? he’s sweet, kind, sensual, and has a booty that just won’t quit. when will he steal me away to the Amazon to live forever in his strong arms. 10/10
Point of contention: Hellboy should be ranked higher. He would be an *extremely* good boyfriend, there’s an entire arc about that. Comes back from the dead and gives up the kingdom of Hell to support you. Good. Amazing. Wonderful boyfriend.
Now here are some more:
Sammael, AKA the desolate one
Probably not a great boyfriend. Selfish, doesn’t have time for you. But hey, you’re a monster fucker or you’re not a monster fucker and if you’re a monster fucker then at least this will be a party in the sack, look at all those tentacles .057/10
Prince Nadua
Looooooooook, look, we all sometimes have bad days and low self-esteem and do things that are self-destructive. But there is no excuse for this nonsense, worst boyfriend, wants to destroy humanity, sure his hair looks great and damn those cheekbones but DO NOT. 0/10
Liz
Yes. Serious, committed, knows what she wants, takes no bullshit, loves with all her heart, sees past your flaws but calls you out when you’re being a butt. Liz is the best 17/10
BUT LISTEN, a nice long therapy and Nuada would be fine, he just needs anger management and learn to let it fucking go. JFC I remember back in 2008 when Hellboy II hit the cinemas and I saw that pale chest on the big screen and I heard him speaking elvish and I was lost right then and there and it was a miracle I got out of the cinema on my own, my knees were that weak lol. I would slam that ostentatious asshat on the mattress ten times a day I swear…
…so as usual what was supposed to be a warm up speed painting exercise took off and ran away from me and decided to be a full illustration. the idea for this is inspired by the lush and evocative writing of the lovely @nocturnememory
i’ll be posting the full piece when i’ve spent some more time going over the whole thing 🐍🐚
Monsters and Villains 