โHe said heโd give me what I wanted. Hae Soo, you said so too. You said Wang So would give me this gift.โ
In that moment when So believes that Hae Soo has been toying with him, that she has made fun of him and betrayed his trust, something inside him breaks. The look he gives her is completely numb except for two emotions – accusation and pain. It must hurt him so much more because just mere minutes ago he was experiencing such happiness, only to fall into the deepest pits of misery now. And all Hae Soo wants to do is to stop him, help him, tell him she didnโt do this to him, but she canโt and So wouldnโt probably let her right now, so utterly numb with pain he is. It must have taken him every ounce of his strength and willpower to take down the mask, untying the strings out of sheer, stubborn pride as his lips quiver and eyes shimmer with unshed tears and shame. Itโs the second time we see So without his mask, but the first time during the day. There is no steam or darkness obscuring the view, instead, the rays od sunshine are merciless and unflattering to him as they finally reveal how raw and pronounced it really is. As if the light made it even worse after itโs been covered for so long under the darkness of his mask.
When the mask comes off he protects himself with an armor of numbness and indifference (Never had so many people seen his scar and it must be unbearable for someone so proud and self-conscious like So – you can see how utterly exposed and vulnerable he feels.), but it cracks more and more with each averted gaze and disgusted look until it shatters completely. First comes expectation, then confusion, then a lost look and then sheer anguish and pain as his heart shatters, until finally his self-preservation instinct kicks in and he hides it all under a wry smile (itโs directed at himself, for being so stupid to hope even for a second they they could accept him) and a mask of nonchanlance, false bravado and cynism, but itโs almost frightening how transparent that facade is, ready to shatter under the weight of too much scrutiny. And it does shatter the moment So notices the look in HSโs eyes – he looks down at her with so much coldness and defiance, as if he was daring her to look away, to show how disgusted she is with him, but she never does, she never looks away from him, she never wavers. What So sees in her eyes rattles him, shakes him and breaks him even more than his siblingsโ reaction – ITโS ACCEPTANCE, COMPASSION AND SYMPATHY BECAUSE SHE CARES ABOUT HIM, BECAUSE SHE IS SUFFERING WITH HIM, BECAUSE SHE CANโT BEAR TO SEE HIM HURTING SO MUCH. IT MAKES HIM GASP IN SHOCK AND STUMBLE AS THE SHEER FORCE OF WHAT HE SEES THERE SENDS HIM REELING BACK. With her he canโt control himself, he is utterly confused and helpless and all he can think about is to get away from it – from her, from the emotions she inspires in him.
His siblings reaction is terrible from our modern point of view, but understandable and expected in the era they live. They are not cruel or evil, well most of them are not, Eun might be just too trusting and naive, but not evil.Itโs caused by the way theyโve been brought up – SUPERSTITIONS HAVE LITERALLY RULED THE LIVES OF KOREANS FOR THOUSANDS OF YEARS – and they have been virtually breastfed these superstitions and prejudices – so their utter shock is understandable. Still, I love how Moo sticks up for So and is ready to fight for him, and Baek Ah as well (he averted his gaze as the first one, never even looking at Soโs scar and I think itโs because he couldnโt bear to watch his brotherโs pain and humiliation).